The Woman in Proverbs 31.... Is she for real?

$aMsUng

“A good wife is hard to find, she is worth more than rubies. Her husband trusts her completely. She likes to work with her hands, looks for wool and flax and brings food from far away. While still dark she prepares food for her family and servant girls. She inspects and buys a field and plants a vineyard. She works with energy, her arms are strong. Her lamps burns late into the night. She makes thread with her hands and weaves her own cloth, keeping her family warm in winter nights. She helps the poor and the needy. She is respected by the people. She looks forward to the future with joy. Her children speak well of her and her husband praises her.”

"We’re all living in the shadow of that infamous icon, The Proverbs 31 Woman, whose life is so busy I wonder, does she have time for friendships, for taking walks, reading good books? Her light never goes out at night? When does she have sex? Somehow she has sanctified the shame most women live under, biblical proof that yet again we don’t measure up. Is that supposed to be godly – that sense that you are a failure as a woman." An excerpt taken from the book, Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge

I may not be the epitome of a Proverbs 31 Woman pictured in the Bible, but I believe I am worth more than rubies too! My husband trusts me…completely! I don’t do hard labor with my hands, don’t even like to garden, but hey! Buying wool from Australia and flax from Egypt or Turkey would cost him an arm and a leg. So I just buy clothing from the rack. It’s cheaper, practical and saves him tons of money indeed!

Our servant girls (doesn’t that just sound a lot better than merely saying cook?) prepare our meals but I make sure they also eat well. I help the poor and the needy, as much as my budget would allow. My light definitely burns late into the night. It’s 2 am and I cannot just go to bed without defending my admirable and not so admirable traits. But who says it has to be dark? Tsk, tsk, John and Stasi, you have much to learn.

I look forward to my silver belle years with joy now, yet still in the process of learning how to age gracefully. I have time for my friends, time to read a good book and watch a movie every now and then. My daughter describes me as “barbaric” (actually, she means cruel). But she's young... and what does she know??? (justifying..... :)

Hmmm…my husband? As long as I exercise regularly, take my vitamins, eat my veggies, stay away from Babes…I’m good! That’s as much compliment I’d get from him nowadays. I don’t consider myself a failure. Just being there for my dear family and having found my niche in my beloved Children’s Ministry, I must say, I live a fulfilling life, serving the Lord in the best capacity I can.

Har-har! I’m taking this too literally. I may not be the archetype of a good steward, but I simply refuse to feel guilty...

So to all women out there, whatever you’re going through… be it for bitter or worst, in joy or in sorrow, or simply stressed out from holding up as models of femininity in our community, just remember, God created us differently. Our essence and purpose in life are distinct from each other. We can’t all be the Bible's Proverbs 31 Woman… so let’s just do the best we can, enjoy the role God has given us and be wonderfully blessed!!!

YES, WHY WORRY?

by $aMsUnG

One more week to go and it will be summer vacation. Sob… sob. Much as I love my daughter, I don’t relish being with her almost 24/7. She’s good for about one to two hours a day, we talk about school, how well she did or how badly she fared for the day, her friends, boys, school projects, her daily gripes about her teachers and the school system, boys (have I mentioned that yet?), what they cooked in homeroom…the new dance steps she learned… anything that crosses her mind!!! Recently she has added a new word to her vocabulary and very often injects it into our conversations. SHOPPING. She seems to be in the buying spree mode, so sorry my dear, but Mama is in the belt-tightening mode. Frequently asked questions now are “Are we going to the mall?” (always directed to me) and “Are we eating out tonight?” (ask Dad). That’s usually reserved for weekends only, but can you imagine hearing that almost everyday for the whole summer? Her reasons for those questions? I’m a teen-ager now, I need more clothes… I’m a growing girl, I need to eat. Yeah, like you need to have your zero cavity wisdom tooth extracted without anesthesia too. Now you know the kind of stress I’ll be facing come this summer? Not that I don’t enjoy shopping with her. It’s actually gratifying to find out your daughter has developed a good fashion sense rather than none at all, but that kind of sense is somewhat draining to the wallet, especially when done on a daily basis.

She is too old to be tagging along with me all the time and too young to be out with friends everyday. Besides, you never really know what they’re up to. Friendster and texting aren’t exactly the solutions I’m looking for. I like activities that involve leaving the house (otherwise she’d be glued to the computer all day long), learning something new, something that would enhance the personality as well. It was easy when she was younger, there were swimming lessons to be had, arts and crafts summer classes… that one worked for many dog days. I have to be innovative. Look for activities that would spark her interest, lay down all the choices and try to summon some enthusiasm out from her. Last year it was gymnastics and jazz. We could probably do it again this year, though I seriously doubt her gymnastics teacher could do the cartwheel with a huge abdominal bulge. Belly dancing??? Coupled with jazz lessons, that might just solve my problem, even if only for a couple of hours three afternoons a week. Throw in some cooking or baking lessons, voice, guitar and drum lessons and I’ll be de-stressed. Mornings are for sleeping in, late nights for watching television or dvds, reading together, fighting as to who gets to use the computer and midnight snacking - so that’s no problemo.

If February is the time I start worrying about unproductive summers it is also the time I start planning our vacation. I usually like to go end of May, just before school opens. I know it’s a long way off yet, but that way I can make as many plans as I want, and if one doesn’t push through, then I have my fallbacks. Even if nothing materializes, working out the details won’t cost us any. For now, my vacation plans and our financial resources are not in sync. So I’m looking for the lowest possible rate, with a reasonably good hotel to Vietnam or Malaysia . If you know of any good deals, please drop me a comment, I’d really appreciate it. I also hear that from Iraq you can fly to almost anywhere for as low as $20, via Scud missile. Breakfast, lodging and return ticket not included. If you’ve taken a crack at this and was able to come back, please confirm.

Another option would be to visit Cagayan de Oro, the Camiguin Island and Davao City . Plus a side trip to Bukidnon. I believe the catchy phrase for it is WOW Philippines ! Cagayan de Oro is known as the “Whitewater Rafting Capital of the Philippines ”. Right! Like we’d really go rafting, we’ll probably end up in the mall again!!! Camiguin’s unique attractions are the sunken cemetary, old church ruins, hot springs, cold springs, you name it, the island has it. Davao is endowed with a variety of picturesque landscapes, fruit plantations and orchid farms, virgin forests that nurture rare wildlife, the very famous pearl farm, among others. The main thing that would draw us to Bukidnon aside from the beautiful scenic view is to visit some old family friends who have drifted off to that part of the country. From Metro Manila to Bukidnon, we now call them the hillbillies.

But at the end of the day, unless the Lord blesses our plans and grants the desires of our hearts, we plan in vain. So why worry? God gives us everything we need, if He feels we need a vacation, then we’ll get one. If not, nobody has ever kicked the bucket from staying home for the whole summer break yet. We put all these possibilities and probabilities in His hands to do as He wants, for He knows what’s best for us. And maybe… we might just end up going to Zimbabwe . Dream on, $aM. It’s three in the morning, perfect time for dreaming… I’m off to bed. ZZzzz…

Long-Winding LIMERICKS

by $aMsUng

In the beginning, God started creating and saw it was good
He finished it in a week because He was in the mood.
But Adam and Eve sinned so we are all out of glory
Which makes it a real, real, real sad story.
Cast out of Eden, hungry and nude,

what do you think did they do for food?

Quino and Jenny, we are so very proud of you
Passing the exam was not an easy thing to do.
Still you persevered until you did
Along with Gil and Janine, indeed.
I’m posting a limerick for all to view
I kid you not,
We’re so happy we’ll shout until we’re blue.

(Is there such a thing such a seven line limerick?

Hey, it’s not everyday we have 4 PRC nursing board

passers so what’s 2 more lines?)

Forgot my own false teeth to my horror
Aghast at myself as I looked in the mirror.
With gums grinning back at me
I look much like a banshee.
Which caused me to back away in terror.

I love traipsing down the beach in my teeny-weeny bikini
Much to the surprise of sunbathers on the shores of Kahili.
They stare at my beefiness and tattooed arm
Back away from me as if I mean them harm.
How would they know I have the charm of a very sweet tortini?

Poem

by $aMsUng

Audrey Hepburn

Audrey Hepburn wrote this wonderful poem
when asked to share her "beauty tips."
It was read at her funeral years later.

For attractive lips, speak words of kindness...
For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.
For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.
For beautiful hair, let a child run his/her fingers through it once a day.
For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone...

I once said to a friend, “If you have nothing nice to say to me, then don’t say anything.” Only to be told, “Then I’ll have nothing to say to you for the rest of my life.” She had the most unattractive lips I’ve ever seen…

My cousin Janet wrote me, “You are a vivacious young woman-- a kindred spirit full of laughter and fun, a heart as unpretentious and sincere.”
Loveliest eyes and very discerning…

Slim figure? That would be Jing Ram, eats like a bird and shares the rest to other people in need. Her generosity knows no bounds. Of course, there are a lot more givers in our church but they eat like a horse…

Beautiful hair… hhmmm… I’d say April, I have no idea if she lets her children run their fingers through her hair but she always looks it, but still manage to come across beautiful inside and out…

JSL truly exemplifies the Proverbs 31 Woman and she puts us all to shame. Her bearing shows the walk she has with her God.
She has poise…

These are some of the women of BCCB, except for the lone individual with unattractive lips. Their stories are the ones that inspire and empower us. In times when their hearts are vulnerable, they carry on with utmost grace and dignity. And they go inward to find God and a sense of inner peace.

SHALOM!!!

Just a Reminder

by $aMsUng

It’s three days away from one of the most over-rated events of the world: Valentine’s Day! So here’s the picture, a fashionably sensitive guy buys a box of chocolates, flowers or a gift that comes in a very small package, reserves a romantic table for two way in advance at an equally romantic but crowded restaurant, only to find the food crummy, the service lousy, with the ambience of Cirque Du Soleil… which he probably paid for too!! Still, lucky is the lady who gets the whole nine yards.

But here are some tips for the insensitive and impervious ones, who do not have an ounce of romantic bone in their body. These are the top 10 worst Valentine gifts for your loved one (husbands or men if you're reading this, take note if you please):

10. Something that looks like you won from the local "peryahan" or carnival, there has never been an article in Better Living on how to establish mood around a miniature-sized scruffy Tweety bird motif.

9. Anything that you accidentally left the receipt from The 99 Peso Store? Destroy all receipts if the gift is from Citi or Ace Hardware. Remember the answer to the question: “Where did you get this?” Your answer should always be, “The mall”

8. Singing “Only You”, especially when it's sang off-key.

7. Take her with you on your all boys night-out! If you even thought this... If you even thought this…If… Never mind.

6. Buying her an expensive stereo “for your car”.

5. Anything too small. Your sweetheart is not the same size as the anorexic sales clerk. So quit saying, “Oh she’s about your size.”

4. Cooking a romantic dinner made with Spam or Vienna Sausage doesn’t just cut it. Even if your buddies say you can make a gourmet meal out of those tin cans.

3. Flowers bought at the last minute looking slightly wilted like they were picked November 1 of last year…

2. Pots, pans, pressure cooker, vacuum cleaner or anything that involves manual labor. This is Valentine’s Day, not MAID’S DAY!

10. Nothing. Even if she says, “Oh don’t get me anything.” Get her something! If you arrive home and realize you have forgotten to get her a thing, tear your shirt and bang your head on the car several times. Tell her you had the prettiest diamond bracelet but you got mugged on your way home.

* Just a reminder, Valentine’s Day falls on February 14th this year.

What Matters More

by $aMsUng

Doing homework used to be uncomplicated. All we needed were papers, a writing pen, a calculator and textbooks for reference. Words that were beyond our comprehension, we looked up in the dictionary. I remember lugging around two huge volumes of The Oxford Universal Dictionary Illustrated, A – M, N –Z. And if I really don’t get it or am just too plain lazy, I’m quick to call up a friend and ask for answers. If not, I go to school early the next day and copy (thanks, Belski, I wouldn’t have made it through high school without you). But my daughter Kolin, my gulay… she’s so smart! She has somebody who works her fingers to the bone for her. Projects, research, reaction papers, you name it, she gets it done ahead of sked…BY ME!!! I know, I know…I’m not doing her any favor by doing practically all her school works. But…hehe…would you believe I’m enjoying myself? I have just learned to copy/paste middle of last year, courtesy of the aforementioned and she has taken full advantage of my new knowledge. Taught me a couple more tricks and she had me eating out of her hands. It’s so amazing how much we can do just by surfing the web. A little complicated than what I was used to and a bit more than I could grasp, but I’m getting there, slow by slow. Click, tap, tap, tap, scroll, search for the right topic, copy, paste, search for image, again click, copy, paste, print and voilá! The work is done. All these in one sitting! What happened to the zooming around looking for a ruler, a pen that doesn’t blot, a calculator that actually works, or transporting heavyweight dictionaries? Because of technology, at least 500 calories that used to get worked off in a normal day now go into permanent unwanted space.

Ngee... I make it sound like I do everything for her except take her place in school, but nah, I help her out every now and then, give her a head start, then she’s on her own. Not all Moms would probably agree with me, leaving them to fend for themselves has its benefit. However, I would like to share with you an inspiring message I received from a friend:

"I am glad that you are enjoying the time you spend helping your daughter with her homework. I think what makes it more satisfying is that you are having quality time with her. Children are hard to please and it’s difficult to get hold of their full attention. With activities like what you are doing you get to know how your child is doing and how she’s using her social skills in school, direct from her own mouth without having to ask her. Sometimes children are intimidated by all sorts of questions but with simple conversations while doing their homework, they open up easily with nary a question on your part. But honestly I am really amazed by the dedication you are giving to your daughter. Nowadays, many Moms are so busy they don't even have time to attend PTA meetings, much more help their children with their school works. I am sure your daughter will become a mother like you, she will remember each moment you spent with her. Memories are priceless, these are your only solid inheritance to her no matter what may happen to her physically, financially and emotionally. So good luck...believe me you are doing a very noble thing and your daughter will always remember this for the rest of her life...be blessed and take care…”

Though Kolin may not fully appreciate the labor of my love, rationalizing that it is my job to help her with every little thing, someday she will, and she will remember the times we spent together, thus making the memories worth all the effort. It’s what I call my investment in the future.

My Significant Other

by $aMsUng

I love late nights while he starts his day at 6am, just when I’m about halfway through my sleep. With the aid of two electronic pills, the PBA and World Series Golf Tournaments, he’s dead to the world around 10pm. Me? I’m partial to waking up at noon, in time for lunch. He’s a mall rat…I’m not! I like going out-of-town, go to the beach or up the mountains, breathe in some fresh air. His idea of relaxation is none other than malling or having a cup of coffee at any place comfy. And I don’t drink coffee, I prefer tea… although warm water would suit me just fine. I can hang around the house all day long… read, watch television or play computer games. He could only stay home if I tied him to our bed. Too bad we don’t have bed posts. I enjoy traveling, seeing more of the world… and here’s the tricky part, now he prefers staying home!!! And they say women are hard to understand???

Sometimes I wonder why the Lord has brought us together. But despite our differences, there is that spark of passion (once upon a time), love and affection for each other. We both pursue different interests, but at the end of the day, we’re together (albeit one asleep, one awake). He’s a health nut, while I adore everything that’s absolutely bad for the health! And for that I get a series of sermonettes, which oftentimes makes me feel I married a preacher.

I’m the don’t-care about physical wellness type…and he looks after me. He’s pretty much an independent guy, does his own grocery shopping, but remembers to buy me yogurt, crackers and low calorie, sugar-free drinks every now and then. He gets hopping mad when I gorge myself with junk food. I start a program and when I’m not around to finish it, he picks up the tab, no questions asked.

He’s still the loving, compassionate, giving and caring man that attracted me to him in the first place. Of course, to point out that one could practically smell him a mile away also factored it. I am the coffeemate to his coffee, he is the honey to my tea. Dissimilar in so many ways… but we blend well together. He fits me like an old and snug favorite shoe. He is my anchor and in his arms I find my haven. He is very supportive of me, I cannot imagine life without him.

Now that’s the most unromantic portrayal of a blissful marriage one could ever write about (certainly, it’s blissful because we’re not together 24/7, otherwise we’d be squabbling over every little thing), but there are some things done in private that are better left unsaid...

Attitude

by $aMsUng

There once was a woman who woke up one morning, looked in the mirror,
and noticed she had only three hairs on her head.

Well, she said, 'I think I'll braid my hair today?' So she did and she had a wonderful day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and saw that she had only two hairs on her head.
'H-M-M,' she said, 'I think I'll part my hair down the middle today?' So she did and she had a grand day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head.
'Well,' she said, 'today I'm going to wear my hair in a pony tail.' So she did and she had a fun, fun day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn't a single hair on her head.

'YEA!' she exclaimed,'I don't have to fix my hair today!'

Attitude is everything.
Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.
Live simply,
Love generously,
Care deeply,
Speak kindly,
Leave the rest to God.
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
It's about learning to dance in the rain!!!

This woman certainly had a severe case of hair loss. Only three lustrous strands of hair on her head? Bet you she’s never had a bad hair day! From three to none…and still be able to exhibit glorious and fun days, is she for real???

Ever thought about going bald? Some men actually think it makes them more distinguished-looking (PLEASE, somebody tell them it simply makes them look...OLD!) For clarification, there’s close-cropped, which is the trend nowadays, and there’s the shiny bald. Hair loss is no laughing matter, so go get help…call (02) 892-HAIR. Ask for Svenson.

But the ladies, well, well, now that’s different, their mane is their crowning glory… take it away and you’d find them on bended knees and uplift arms praying, “Lord, take me, right this moment!” Losing one’s hair is like losing a limb.

It happened to me, so here’s my sob story.

What an experience having cancer is. Wouldn’t have chosen it on the menu of health struggles as I am one of those who wants to live to be a hundred. I knew chemotherapy would cost me my beautiful hair, but nothing ever prepared me for the huge chunks that fall off every time I shampooed. Finally, with more bald spots on my head than hair, I opted to shave it all off. I thought I looked quite voguish with my cap or bandanna until one day my sister’s friend mistook me for a boy. I was also all skin and bones then but that’s no excuse for her oversight! I wanted to tell her to get new glasses… I was even willing to shell out money for it!!! But being the tactful person that I am, I just prayed, “Lord, please forgive her for her poor eyesight.”

Diseases can be our spiritual flat tire – what may seem to be disasters at the time may end up redirecting our lives in a meaningful way. The miracles of my past are the strengths of my future. I am who and what I am today because of what I’ve been through. To all the people, especially my family and good friends, who have supported me and prayed for me, much thanks from the deepest corner of my heart. This is one side effect that I most sincerely welcome, connecting with incredibly beautiful people. This happened to me 12 years ago, and I am happy to say that by the grace of God, I am clean.

And I got my hair back!!!

Fresh Start

by

-$aMsUng-

I’ve never been big on New Year’s Resolution, especially when I never keep them anyway. But this year I need to make some drastic changes in my life.

Number one: I need to wean myself off my tranqs. I’m getting to be a regular junkie…but that would literally mean sleepless nights! The best time of the day for me starts at the witching hour, no kidding! I’m a certified nocturnal creature. So what to do? I can get a job at the call center (I’d probably be calling in sick more than I’d be working. Sad to say, this body is made in China); be a security guard, I’d be so alert not even a stray cat can get past me. GRO? Need to take up ballroom dancing ala Jennifer Lopez in Shall We Dance first though. So far, those are the only options I could think of…and none of them look or sound too appealing.

Number two: Improve my badminton game. I need to be more like Jack, nimble and quick, thank goodness I don’t have to jump over a candlestick. Okay, so here are the strokes I need to improve on. My high clear which I want to stretch all the way from one end of the court to the other, powerful smashes that will intimidate my opponents, blocks and drives to counter-attack their smash; drop shots that gets them running towards all directions! I also resolve never to play ping-pong in a badminton court. But to be able do all these, I have to have my forty winks, hence the need for my unhealthy dose of vitamins hoping I’d be sleepyzzz by the time I finish posting this blog.

Maybe I’ll start New Year’s Resolution number one tomorrow or someday, but I definitely need to get some shut-eye so I can dream of my number two Resolution.

But seriously? We don’t need the New Year to make all sorts of resolutions which always remain unresolved, regardless of our good intentions. My badminton game still sucks! But I thank God that He gives us a fresh start daily. We make mistakes, we stumble and fall, but we can always get up and start anew, anytime…anywhere. With the Lord by our side, there is nothing that we cannot do. So I think my best position would be to start my day with a recommitment to the Lord, thank Him for His gift of SALVATION, freely given to anyone who chooses to accept. If there is one absolute thing in my life… it is the fact that I am a child of God and I am so blessed that He bestowed such a precious gift upon me. “Are you?”

So here’s to a great year ahead of all of us, hope it brings us nothing but good. Have a wonderful year, everyone!!! Or rather, have a wonderful everyday, everyone!!!

Five DON'TS when you are sleeping

contributed by: MAL

1. DON'T SLEEP WITH WATCH.
Watches can emit a certain level of radioactivity. Though small, but if you wear your watch to bed for a long time, it might have adverse effects on your health.

2. DON'T SLEEP WITH PHONE
Putting the phone beside your bed or anywhere near you is not encouraged. Though some of us will use phones as alarm clocks, but please put the phone as far as possible. Scientists have proved that electrical items including mobile phone and television sets emit magnetic waves when used. These waves can cause disruptions to our nervous system. Therefore if you need to put your mobile phone near you, switch it off first.

3. DON'T SLEEP WITH MAKE UP

People who sleep with make up might have skin problems in the long run. Sleeping with make up will cause the skin to have difficulty in breathing and problem in perspiring. You will also need a much longer time to go into deep sleep.

4. DON'T SLEEP WITH BRA

Scientists in America have discovered those that wear bras for more than 12 hours have a higher risk of getting breast cancer. So go to bed without it.

5. DON'T SLEEP WITH OTHERS' SPOUSE

You may never wake up again.